Top Three Things NOT to Say or Do When First Meeting Someone:
- Say to your new supervisor, who is kindly explaining the gritty ramified details of your work, “Gawd, now I know why you guys store that much liquor for Fridays…”
- To the question 'Have you tried English Tea at all yet?' from Nice Nerdy Boy (or someone you might or might not fancy due to Jesus-knows-how-long-you’ve-had-a-good-roll-in-the-sack – especially if that someone also happens to work at above mentioned new job), distractingly answer:
“Um, no, not quite… I want my first time to be special, you see..."...And then proceed to type maniacally on keyboard.
“…I mean, High Tea! HIGH TEA!! I’m waiting to do High tea, yes?! HAHAHAHA!... Um, okay, don’t mind me – lala la lala lalala….”
- Accept to proof-read your seemingly nice (and rather handsome, to be honest) landlord’s books for extra money - without asking its topic. Which turns out to be about ‘How To Trick Your Undeserved Dick In As Many Holes As Possible Without Getting Caught For the Painfully Idiotic Old Misogynistic Shitrack That You Are’. Obviously.
This has been a public announcement brought to you by Social Inept Candidate Of 2007.